A Few Bites a Day - The Only 8 Things I Need to Know to Lose Weight

I started losing weight by only knowing four or five of these things and have come to learn the other three to four over the years.

1. I know my target weight

Trust the Body Mass Index
Calculate your BMI
Use the BMI to set your target weight

The Body Mass Index (BMI) is a simple way to set a target for a healthy weight. Many people dislike the BMI because it tells them what they already know but haven't admitted yet. I was one of these people.

The BMI turns people off because of its blunt labels - "normal", "overweight" or "obese". But, I gained an appreciation for the BMI when I looked beyond the labels to understand the BMI. It turns out there's more to the BMI than figuring out which label applies to you. The labels are secondary. What the BMI really tells you is your risk of suffering from a weight related illness such as type II diabetes or heart disease.

If your BMI is between 18 and 25 (i.e. normal range), then you have a low risk of suffering from such an illness. If your BMI is above 30, then your risk is high.

It's like how insurance companies assess your risk of having an accident based on how many moving violations you have. People with no moving violations are considered normal risk. People with a lot of moving violations are high accident risks. Nevertheless, some people without moving violations will cause accidents, just as some who drive fast may never be involved in an accident. Similarly, some people in the normal weight range of 18-25 will suffer from a weight related illness, just as some folks with BMI above 30 will not. It's just that those above 30 have a higher liklihood of suffering from a weight related illness.

When I was overweight I used the BMI to set my initial goal weight by finding how much I would need to weigh to have a BMI of 25. At my heaviest, my BMI was approaching 30, which is high risk territory. At 5'4" tall, I weighed 165 pounds. To change my BMI to 25 I needed to lose 19 pounds to weigh 146.

Find your current BMI - Grab a calculator and punch this in: 703 x Your weight (in pounds) / Your height (in inches) / Your height (inches). For example, my current BMI is 703 x 137 lbs / 64 inches / 64 inches = 23.5.
Find your goal BMI (if your current BMI is greater than 25) - Punch this into a calculator: 25 x Your height in inches x Your height in inches / 703. So, for me, my target weight was: 25 x 64 inches x 64 inches / 703 = 146 pounds.

My BMI was above 25 and closing in on 30 in 2001, my year of reckoning. I targeted 25 (or 146 pounds) as my goal weight when I started losing weight. It was a great day when I hit that target. I was surprised when I found that I was able to keep going. Ever since the summer of 2001 my BMI has stayed in the 22.8 - 24.0 range.

Click here to look at BMI tables to see the bottom and top ends of the weight ranges for someone of your height.

2. I know why my body stores fat

Fat is simply an energy storage tank
Body fat can result from a low fat diet
The number of fat cells in your body doesn't change, just the size of those cells
Genetics distributes fat cells across your body
Eating infrequently makes you fatter by slowing your metabolism, burning fewer calories, and causing your body more likely to hold onto any extra calories
1 pound of fat holds about two days of the body's energy needs, or 3,500 calories

My body uses my fat as a storage tank for fuel.

My fat cells are my body's insurance policy against famine. Body fat is the reserve tank of energy that my body switches to when I run out of energy from my last meal.

My body converts calories from fat, protein and carbohydrates into energy and body fat. If I'm eating too many calories from any source (fat, carbs or protein) my body will store many of the extra calories as fat. That's why eating a low fat diet alone doesn't keep the weight off, which was a busted myth for me. Limiting my calorie intake (see #4) is what I need to do.

One might ask, why does my body use fat as the energy storage? Because it's efficient. One gram of fat holds 9 calories. Compare that with 4 calories in a gram of protein or carbs.

I also once believed that fat on certain spots of my body came from not working out that specific area enough. I thought the fat on belly came from not doing 200 crunches a day. Yet another myth.

Your body's fat cells have been in place since puberty. The number of fat cells rarely changes and how the fat cells are distributed throughout your body is based on genetics. When you get fatter, the fat cells just get bigger. They puff up like balloons. The bigger they get, the more energy they have trapped up in there for a rainy day.

Your body prefers to stuff the fat cells with energy in certain areas of your body before other areas. My body loves my belly and love handles. However, when I pushed those to maximum capacity, my body started stashing calories wherever - under my chin, my fingers (I almost had to resize my wedding ring), my arms, legs, toes.

When my body needs to tap this energy, it does so in reverse order. Accountants refer to this inventory methodology as LIFO (Last In First Out). My chin and fingers were the first places I noticed shrinking when I lost weight. The places that your energy planner prefers will be the last and most stubborn places to lose size, which frustrates a lot of people.

Given that fat cells are distributed by genetics and your body prefers certain areas, working out a specific part of your body won't cause you to lose fat in that particular spot.

Here's one final life changing realization about how my body uses fat before I move on to the next topic. If I go for long periods without eating, I'm signaling to my body that it needs to stash more fat reserves in order to fuel my body in those periods of famine. If I starve my body often enough, I can cause my body to become conservative. It'll do two things to hurt my waist line. First, he'll stuff every extra calorie into my fat cells for the rainy days, not letting any spare calories slide by. Second, he'll slow down my metobolism to conserve energy as much as possible.

An effective and counterintuitive way to lose weight is to make your body become a less efficient calorie machine. You do this simply by eating more often. I believe a key reason for my weight control was to simply incorporate a late afternoon snack in my day, thereby eliminating the 7 to 8 hour-long stretch of time between lunch and dinner and making my body less likely to horde calories and slow my metabolism.

Here's one final note on fat. Each pound of body fat holds about 3,500 calories of energy, or enough energy to meet the body's needs for a little less than two days.

3. I know how many calories my body burns each day

Most people don't know or overestimate how many calories they burn
A common mistake is to overestimate how many calories burned in exercise
Making more reasonable estimates of this amout is a must

Do you? I find that most people don't have a clue.

As a very rough estimate, your body burns about 10 calories for every pound of body weight each day. So, if you weigh 150 pounds, then you burn about 1,500 calories. If you weigh 200 pounds, you burn 2,000 calories. This is how much you burn before any exercise.

Add to that calories burned in exercise. Let's say you walk for an hour each day. That adds about 200 calories to your calorie usage.

Of course, it's impossible to know your exact calorie usage. To my knowledge there are no tests available to do that, but using reasonable estimates have worked for me.

As I mentioned in #2, how often you eat can impact the rate at which you burn calories. Going 5 or more hours once a day between meals can reduce your calorie burn rate by as much 10%. For a 200 pound person, that's 200 calories a day which can translate to 15-20 pounds of weight gain each year.

Before I lost weight, I thought exercising as much as I did gave me license to snarf down just about anything that I wanted to. Wrong-O. It's a common mistake. I often see people overestimate their exercise calorie usage by double.

If you're eating like you burnt 1,000 calories exercising but really burnt 500, your waistline will expand quickly. This is the cause of the too common experience of exercising hard with nothing to show for it on the scale. if you are already exercising and aren't seeing much result, you may want to consider re-evaluating your exercise calories. And, rather than stepping up your exercise program any more, you'll get more bang for your buck from #4.

4. I know how many calories I put in my body each day

You need to balance calories you put in with calories that you burn
Fat people eat more calories than they burn
Keep a food journal to estimate your daily caloric intake
Get better at estimating calories
Reduce on-the-spot food decisions by settling into a routine of planned or repeated meals

Food calorie information is readily available. When I added up the calories on the stuff I'd been eating daily for years the problem was solved. I was eating way too much. I had to figure out how to eat the right amount of calories without feeling like I was starving myself. More on how I solved the problem in #5.

To find out how many calories you are eating, keep a food journal for a week. Write down everything. If the package has the calories on it, write that down too. If the calorie information isn't readily available, write down your best guess and write "estimate" next to the guess. Then, when you have a chance, look up the calorie content on the Internet or a calorie book. Within a few days your guesses will become more accurate.

Also, within a few days, your average daily caloric intake will become obvious. Keeping a food journal for a full week will allow you to pinpoint when you drop calorie bombs on your waistline. Your Monday calorie intake is likely about the same as your Tuesday intake. But your Friday or Saturday intake will be much different.

I've "automated" most meals to take the out the guesswork of my calorie intake. I have specific options for breakfast, lunch, snacks and dinner. I know what I'm going to eat and portions beforehand so I don't have to make those decisions on the fly. This help prevent me from straying.

When I eat out, I try to have 1 or 2 options - and my portions - thought out before I step foot into the restaurant (see #6). This will help prevent me from falling to temptation or losing track of what I'm eating while deep in conversation.

5. I know how to eat the number of calories that my body needs without feeling hungry

Get about 40% of my calories from carbohydrates, 30% from fat (preferrably unsaturated) and 30% from protein. This mix of macronutrients keeps me feeling satisfied longer. Before I learned this, I probably took in about 60 or 70% of my calories through carbs. I digested this quickly and it caused my blood sugar to go up and then drop - giving me hunger pains. These pains stopped immediately when I switched my calorie mix closer to the 40/30/30 model.

Don't go more than 5 waking hours without eating. Incorporating the 4:30 p.m. snack in my day did wonders for me. This kept me satiated to dinner and I found that I didn't eat nearly as much at dinner.

Drink lots of water. Water aids metabolism and it keeps the digestive system humming. There's no reason other than laziness to not drink plenty of this stuff each day.

6. I know how to control portions

Portion control is the most important tool for controlling calories
Exercise along with portion and calorie control is essential for losing weight
Suggestions for developing your ability to control portions
Be aware of things that work against you
Read Brian Wansink's book, Mindless Eating

If I had to choose between appropriate portions and exercise to control my weight, I'd choose portion control. Why? Because, it's responsible for 80% of my weight control.

If you want to go from New York to LA you'll fly on a plane. If your destination is weight loss, portion control is your airplane. Exercise is a tailwind. A tailwind will get the plane to LA quicker, but without the airplane the tailwind won't be much help.

Many people start an exercise program to lose weight. And that'd work if exercise was the only thing they changed. But, they usually don't watch what they eat and the increased physical activity makes them hungrier so they increase their calorie intake by about the same amount as their increased calorie burn. Simple math says that no weight will be lost. That's like punching a hole in the side of a bucket to drain out the water, but then adding water to bucket at the same rate that it's draining. The water level in the bucket will remain the same.

Experience is a wonderful thing. It's taken me years to develop my bag of tricks to keep my portions in check. Here's a list of the one's I find particularly useful:

Eat 3 meals and a mid-afternoon snack every day. Eating often keeps me from becoming famished. When I'm famished I eat more than I need because I eat faster and go beyond the point of being satisfied before I realize it.

Eat a balance of carbs, fat and protein at each meal and snack. This balance keeps me feeling satisfied longer. If I eat an all carb snack, I'll get hungry in an hour. With some fat and protein I can easily make it to my next meal without hunger pains.

I know what I'm going to eat before I eat it. This may sound boring, but I typically keep a similar meal routine each day. Knowing what I'm going to eat beforehand keeps me from having to make decisions on the fly, which leads to bad decisions. See What I Eat page for more information.

I wait 5 minutes after finishing my plate before I decide to go back for more or not. After the 5 minute waiting period, I rarely go back for seconds. By that time my mind has caught up with my stomach and eating doesn't sound like such a good idea anymore.

I think about what I'm going to order at a restaurant before arriving. I usually have 2 or 3 safe options in my mind before I go in, that way I'm less tempted to stray into dangerous territory.

When dining out, I generally stake off the portion size that I'm going to eat before putting a bite of food in my mouth. I often ask the servers to give me a to-go box with my meal, that way I can cut my meal in half and put it in the box before I'm tempted to eat it. Then I can savor the other half while I eat it. As a side note, I'd be happy if more restaurants offered smaller portion sizes as an option.

I own what goes in my mouth. Nobody can force me to eat anymore than I want. I've learned to graciously say no to seconds (but offer my gracious compliments) to those great cooks in my life who love to make sure everyone is well fed.

If others around us are pigging out, it's easier for us to justify piging out ourselves. I don't do that anymore.

I don't try to match the pace and volume of those eating around me. I use to. I think we all tend to fall into this habit without knowing it when eating with others. It's good to be aware of it and try to prevent.

There are many things in our daily environment that work against our best efforts to control our weight. Many of these things are so subtle that we don't even notice them. I highly recommend reading Brian Wansink's book, Mindless Eating, to gain a better awareness of these things.

I found that I had that many things he wrote about I had already figure out, like marking off your portion before you start eating, but reading his book confirmed that I had the right idea and there were plenty of other things he brought to light that I hadn't considered.

One interesting thing he discovered was that we face 200 food decisions daily rather than the 3 or 4 that we think we do. For example, each time we pass a candy dish in the office we decide whether to get a piece or not.

Wansink's main theme seemed to be very much in line with mine: a few bites of food each day can make a big difference in your waistline over time. And reading his book can give you a leg up on combatting those few bites that make a difference.

7. I know that my weight can fluctuate a few pounds up and down and it's not a big deal

Understand that your weight will fluctuate by a few pounds and its nothing to lose sleep over
Weigh yourself often so you can get use to the fluctuations and be able to recognize sooner, rather than later, if you are experiencing a normal fluctuation or a trend in the wrong direction

Some friends of mine who were on a retail diet were overly fixated with achieving a specific target weight, to the pound. The retail store wrote down their target weight and proceeded to help them with eating plans to get them to that weight. To the retail store's credit my friends did lose weight. Weighing in every week at the store was an added accountability that helped these friends not cheat on their diets.

Both friends had great success in losing weight. However, they did not achieve their target weight (or haven't yet). Big deal. Both are now well within the normal BMI range for people their height and both look good and are healthy. They don't need to achieve the weight they originally targeted. Those targets were too aggressive, unless they were planning to try out to be a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader.

I was disappointed that the retail store didn't advise them of this. I'm sure the store thinks it'll keep them as clients longer if they are trying to hit an impossible target. But, I think it'd be much better for business in the long term if they would first guide their customers to a healthy weight goal and, second, define the weight goal in terms of a range rather than a specific pound.

Our body weights naturally fluctates by a few pounds based on a large number of factors. Trying to maintain your weight to a specific pound will drive you nuts and that stress could cause you to put on real pounds. I know people who gain two pounds after losing 30, and think it's the end of the world. They become depressed and start up their bad eating habits and then they really start putting on the pounds.

I do advocate weighing myself often. I know that many diets do not recommend this, but I feel that it does two things for me. First, it keeps me honest. My brain may be able to lie to itself about how much food I'm eating, but the needle on the scale won't. Second, and more important, is that I learn what swings my weight within a 4-5 pound range so I don't freak out as the needle moves.

For example, eating at my favorite Mexican restaurant typically adds 2 pounds to my weight for about 2 days. My theory is that the extremely salty food increases my water retention and goes away after a couple days. I also know that if I don't eat and drink enough on a 100 mile bike ride, I can lose 3-4 pounds, which isn't good. Also, I tend to gain a pound or two just before I get sick.

I do start to get concerned when the needle sticks at the top end of the range for more than a couple days. That's where weighing myself often keeps me honest. It makes me start thinking about where I may have relaxed on my diet and allows me to course correct before I do more damage.

8. I don't deprive myself of the stuff I like

Continue to eat what you like, only learn how to do it in moderation

Gaining control of my diet doesn't mean that I'm becoming a monk where I have to prove myself with feats of extreme willpower. I'm not taking taking a vow to a higher power to banish sinful foods from my diet. I won't be judged at the Gates on whether I ate a few things that I like. I have to constantly remind myself that my goal is to control my weight not to set a new standard of self control the likes of which has never been known.

I see others who try to remove their goodies completely. What happens? We all know the ending of this story. Some late night we'll go into a trance and then somehow find ourselves stuffing the taboo food in our faces. And eating. And eating.

Which isn't good.

I don't deprive myself of the stuff I like. However, that doesn't mean that I overindulge in it. Overindulging is where damage can be done.

I like ice cream, chocolate, beer and wine. My trick to not overindulging is to eat (or drink) moderate portions of the stuff often enough to quelch any cravings. I eat a 3-6 Hershey's dark chocolate kisses every day. Maybe a couple more if I've had a tough work out. By eating a little each day, I always know that the next "fix" isn't far off, so I don't try to horde up.

I love ice cream. When I first started controlling my weight, I allowed myself a small ice cream treat of my choosing once a week. I looked forward to that day! Ice cream is dangerous enough that I don't recommend eating daily. But, a small amount once a week won't do much damage. And, next week was never so far away, so I didn't need to eat it like there was no tomorrow.

Something strange happened after several months. Ice cream lost its luster. I believe that allowing myself to eat it regularly without the guilt curbed my craving in the long run. Perhaps its a lot like how girls want to go out with the bad boys in school. There's something to the guilty pleasure that keeps the craving alive. But, once it loses it's bad boy appeal, perhaps the craving goes away too. I still enjoy ice cream, but I can go months without eating it now and not even think about it.

As for beer and wine, I drink one each day and on rare occasions I might have two drinks. The medical community seems to be in agreement that, at best, 1-2 drinks per day may be healthy and, at worst, have no effect.

What about exercise?

Did you notice that my list didn't include exercise? Several readers of my book got the impression that I lost weight because of my exercise program, especially my love for bicycling. That got me to wondering just how important was exercise to weight loss? My answer: Not nearly as important as many people think.

I exercised a lot while I was gaining weight. When I started losing weight the things I changed were how much I ate, what I ate and how often I ate. My exercise before and after was about the same.

In the past six years there have been times when I couldn't exercise and, naturally, during the winter I'm not nearly as active as summertime. Yet, I didn't pick up weight in these periods. Why? Because I stay conscious of what I'm eating and how much I'm eating in relation to how many calories I'm burning. I can control my weight without exercise. Unfortunately, many are under the mistaken impression that exercise is a license to eat whatever they want. I once believed that and that belief contributed to my weight gain (see my diet myths page).

As I mentioned in #6, if used properly exercise can be a tailwind for your weight loss but not the main driver.

A typical exercise routine adds 10% - 20% to your daily calorie burn. Consider that an inactive 160 pound person needs to consume 1,600 - 1,700 calories per day to remain 160 pounds. While an active 160 pound person needs to consume 1,800 - 2,000 calories to maintain the weight. That's not a big difference! The difference between 1,700 and 2,000 calories is only a few bites. It's one Coke or cookie.

Money quote: It's far more important what I put in my mouth than anything else I do.

Exercise can provide you with lots of great benefits. It allows you to fudge on your calorie intake. It improves your overall health. Makes you more energetic. Reduces stress. Increases your metabolism. Allows you sleep better. Strengthens your immune system. It gives you something else to do other than eating. I highly recommend it. But I don't want you to discount your own chances at fixing your weight problem by thinking exercise is THE answer. It's not. Controlling your food intake is THE answer and I would not be willing to bet on your success in losing weight until you realize that.